Early in my career, I regularly found myself in bookstores looking for the next book on ‘building confidence’ to give me the edge and to assist with my professional development.
I know most of you have also been in the same situation wandering aimlessly up and down the aisle at the book shop (or surfing Google for the more tech savvy!).
Today, my search has evolved to books about ‘building charisma.’
One of the best books I have come across on this topic is by Olivia Cabane. Her book The Charisma Myth highlights that the three foundation pillars needed to start building charisma are power (being perceived as able to affect the world around us), presence (having a moment-to-moment awareness of what is happening) and warmth (goodwill towards others).
These three pillars resonated with me because I realised I had seen them in action before.
We have all had a work colleague who has what appears to be a natural ability to light up a room when they enter, who inspire, motivate or simply bring a smile to the people they interact with. They seem to exercise these three pillars organically. But rest assured, while this ability may come easier to some, this ‘likeability’ can be practised, and like any other skill, can be learned.
Another author or expert, I suggest you investigate is Aja Frost and her recent article on The Muse.
Aja has outlined practical ‘likeability’ steps that we can implement today that will not only increase your power, presence and warmth, but will also make you happier in the process!
“Many of us have mistakenly believed that personality, was totally organic – that you couldn’t cultivate likeability. This is not entirely true. We can all do several simple things on a routine basis to not only become more well-liked, but also happier,” she says.